Pinocchio’s Viagra Link Uncovered

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Scientists at the Di Napoli University in Florence, Italy have announced a startling discovery. In investigating the history of the tale of Pinocchio they found evidence of a Viagra-like substance they believe to be the possible cause of the puppet’s growing nose as related in the classic fable.

“The excavation of Gepetto’s workshop was exciting enough in itself,” said Professor Fulvio Gaspari of the University’s Department of Archaeology, “but this was an unexpected revelation. We did a chemical analysis of wood shavings found in the site and residue on woodworking tools, expecting to find pine and balsa, typical materials used in marionette construction.” Instead, Gaspari said, the team found it had collected some rather exotic wood samples.

Scientists determined the wood to be yohimbe, a West African species of tree whose bark is commonly used as an aphrodisiac. In addition, Gaspari said, “Spectroscopic analysis showed the presence of a chemical compound similar to sildenafil citrate, the active ingredient in the pharmaceutical Viagra.”

Although more research is necessary, Gaspari confirmed that the scientists believe it is likely that the presence of this Viagra-like chemical in the wood may account for the “growing nose” phenomena recorded in the story of Pinocchio.

Gaspari added that the team also recovered as yet undiscovered sketches from Gepetto’s work notebooks that look like the sketches for a novel, if a bit disturbing, sex toy..

“I’m not at liberty to reveal details in the text, as the ownership of the manuscript is being contested by the author’s estate” said Gaspari, “However, I can say that the original wooden figure designed by the puppet maker Gepetto was apparently anatomically correct in all respects, and the nose is apparently not the only part of the anatomy engineered to grow.” Gaspari added that this recent discovery may also explain the origin of the expression “to get a woody.”

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